Anagrammed NCAA Brackets West Region
Boise State vs La Salle
boise state: a obese tits
la salle explorers: parallels sex roles
boise state is just being mean. la salle is being experimental, but fair. la salle advances. FAIR PLAY.
(1) Gonzaga vs (16) Southern University
gonzaga bulldogs: Gnus Zoo, GG Ballad
southern unviersity: Enshrine Ivory Tutus; Universe History Nut
While University History Nut might be the best and most comprehensive phrase of the West, it also talks about enshrining ivory and the exploitation and endangering of elephants is not cool on my list. Meanwhile, Gonzaga has a zoo for Gnus and sings ballads about them! GG indeed. Gonzaga moves on ahead for loving and singing about gnus.
(8) Pittsburgh vs (9) Wichita State
pittsburgh panthers: Bagpipers Nth Truths
wichita state: Satiate Witch; Wait It, Chaste; Teach Waits It; I White, Act At
Let’s look at Wichita. Wait? Chaste? Teach Wait? If you satiate you’re a witch? C’mon Wichita, liven up here. Abstinence doesn’t work! Then, to top it off, you’re white so you better act it?? Das racist.
Meanwhile, Pittsburgh panthers is taking Bagpipers to the Nth level, and that’s the truth. BAGPIPERS YOU GUYS. It anagrams to bagpipers. Clear winner here. Bagpipers, who I believe are not so chaste nor racist.
(5) Wisconsin vs (12) Mississippi
wisconsin madison: admission wins on; simian dons wino
ole miss: Smile So; Me I loss
What’s in a name?
Wisconsin knows its gonna win and win on, with an admission to the 2nd round. And for kicks, it then talks about monkeys wearing drunk people.
And look to Ole Miss. Hey Ole Miss, I’m sorry, but it’s in your name: Me, I loss. That’s right Ole Miss, you do lose. But at least you can keep your smile… so…..
(4) Kansas State vs (13) La Salle
kansas state: Satan Steaks
la salle explorers: please relax rolls
When I first read Satan Steaks, i couldn’t decide if that was positive or negative. As a vegetarian, I have interpretted it as a win, saying all steaks are work of the devil. Meanwihle La Salle is having to tell me to relax and cut back on my bread intake. I’m sorry La Salle, no one comes between a lady and her carbs. Satan Steaks it is.
(6) Arizona vs (11) Belmont
arizona wildcats: A Wainscot Lizard; Cola Wizard Stain
belmont bruins: Bomb Lent Ruins;
Belmont sounds religious and aggressive. Bombing Lent? That’s weird. Meanwhile, Arizona is a COLA WIZARD STAIN. I don’t know what all that means, but it’s my new band name. Cola Wizard Stain’s first single is going to be A Wainscot Lizard. WAINSCOT. I might change my name to Cola Wizard Stain.
(3) New mexico vs (14) Harvard
new mexico: Mexico New
harvard crimson: Sir Arch Van Dorm; Rad Ram Corn Shiv
Wow, thanks you guys. Thank you both for bringing nothing to the table. New Mexico gives me Mexico New? I give it to Harvard, reluctantly, because it at least attempted to create some sort of mediaval character of Sir Arch Van Dorm. I assume he stormed castles. With his Rad Ram and his Corn Shiv. Ok actually, shiving someone with corn is pretty impressive.
(7) Notre Dame vs (10) Iowa State
notre dame: Mead Tenor, Armed Note
iowa state: Await Toes; Sweat Iota
Iowa state keeps talking about sweat and toes and i can’t get on board with that. No matter how long I wait, I will never be waiting for your toes. However, Notre Dame has drunk singers with Mead Tenor. and they come armed with harmonious notes. That’s beautiful Notre Dame, just beautiful.
(2) Ohio State vs (15) Iona
ohio state: Hat Otiose; Oo Ate Shit
ionagaels: Analogies; Lean As I Go
Ohio State taught me a new word: Otiose, which means “serving no purpose; useless.” and that’s exactly how i feel about your anagrams. a useless hat? eating shit? C’mon Ohio, i thought you were better than this.
Then there’s Iona, out from the back, which anagarms perfectly to ANALOGIES. A single wonderful word? Then it has swagger as it’s leaning all about as it’s going? You do have swagger, you have analogies.